the importance of choosing the RIGHT struggle | writing vlog

So last week I visited my friends Ricky
and Kendall out in Tyler, Texas, and what they’re doing out there is this really
exciting project. They’re building a homestead that’s gonna have a net
positive impact on the environment. By living there, they’re actually gonna make
the environment better. A lot of us, I think, are aiming for having a less
negative impact on the environment, right? In other cases, I think maybe we’re going
for even a neutral effect, where it’s like we walk or we bike, so we’re not
creating or making the world worse. I think what’s really exciting about what my
friends Ricky and Kendall are doing are they’re actively trying to make the soil
better, grow more trees, use materials to build their home that come from the land.
It’s a really cool thing, and actually, they have their own YouTube channel
about that journey called “Not a Habit.” You should check it out. I’m gonna link
it in the little card thing; you should definitely subscribe. They’re a super cool
family, and they’re doing a lot of really interesting things. I got a chance to visit
them, I got to bulldoze a tree, I got to hang out with my niece and nephew–
they’re just a super great family. The visit helped me clarify what it is
that I love about writing, what it is I love about what I’m doing. Ricky’s one of my closest friends, but he and I could not be more different in the things that we
love to do. First time I met him, I think he was like rebuilding an engine for
this car he had since high school. I used to come over and just hang out in
his garage. I wasn’t super employed at the time, so I
would had a lot of free time, and I’d go over and hang on his garage. He would
always be covered in grease and be working on a car project of some kind. He
did something called a diesel swap for his Land Cruiser. That was his
off-road vehicle. He helped me get around my major car issues by teaching me my
way around an engine. To tell you the truth, I’ve never understood why he loves
working on machines, because working on machines does nothing but stress me out.
I’ve done some pretty heavy projects for my cars, but they were always out
of necessity because I couldn’t afford a mechanic. It’s always
cheaper to just do things yourself. Yeah, I just never enjoyed it. I
always cried all the time. I’d always work on my car, and like at some point, I would get so
frustrated I would be brought to tears, and he’d be like, “it’s okay man, it’s
okay.” It was kind of crazy to go out to his homestead with him and his wife
and his two kids and see how far they’ve come.
At one point, we got there, and we were trying to operate the bulldozer, but the
bulldozer’s battery was out because he had swapped the battery on the
bulldozer with the tractor, and then once the tractor was good, we had to move
something out of the way, and then we had to swap the battery again. But Ricky,
you could tell, was just having so much fun solving these problems. To him, this
was as fun as doing a crossword or a word search or making a puzzle is for
some people. Machines are like puzzles to him, and he loves working on them. And I
just, I don’t understand it, but it was fun to watch him do that because
it made me think about something I had read from Mark Manson’s book, “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F***.” One of the things that I walked away from that book
really chewing on is the idea that, even when you’re doing what you love, you’re
dealing with a certain set of problems. Every new life experience comes with its
own set of problems. When we say we would rather have something else, what we’re really
saying, whether we know it or not, is “I would rather have that set of problems
than this set of problems.” That’s really all life is, according to Mark Manson’s
book: trading up of problems, and the best thing you can do is find
the problem set you love fixing, that you love to solve. For me, the problems I love
to solve are all writing-related. I love to figure out like, “Oh, what’s the right
story structure for this sort of thing, how do I really make the reader feel
what I’m feeling, how do I entertain, how do I scare, how do I pull emotions out of
myself and put it into these strings of words?” Those are the problems I love
solving. Now, Ricky hates writing, and to him, the idea of me spending eight
hours a day writing marketing copy, and then coming home and spending a few more
hours writing my fiction, would just make his eyes bug out. He could not deal with that. Him watching me do that was sort of like me watching
him replace an engine: he’s just like “how do you do that?
How do you just do that? Why is it so easy for you? Why do you enjoy that?” And
that’s really what fulfillment is, that’s really the point: you want to
choose the problems you love solving. That’s what watching Ricky and Kendall
and their kids made me realize, was that they had finally found the set
of problems they really love to solve. It’s a
beautiful thing to see when you when you see that someone’s discovered what that
is. Thank you guys so much for watching this
video! Hit like if you liked it, please subscribe if you want more videos like
this, follow me on Twitter and Instagram. My handle for both platforms is @rhoadey. If you want to support this channel, please check out my Patreon. It’ll be
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in progress, a look at all my stories as I write them, articles on the creative
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writer to bring their work to a publishable level, check it out! I think
you’ll really like it. Thanks again for watching, and keep on

2 comments on “the importance of choosing the RIGHT struggle | writing vlog”

  1. Ricky Stoner says:

    Dude I just finished Mark Manson's book yesterday. Highly recommend it for anyone who is alive. It was so much fun having you out to our homestead. Keep on writing

  2. timsalz says:

    Thanks for this… I have been having so much fun watching their videos, and now YOU! Thanks. Grace and Peace to you.

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